Posted on February 25, 2016
I woke up this morning in a full out panic attack, mentally not prepared for the 24 hours of travel it would take to get back home.
I walked over 100 miles of the California coast. I breathed hard with every step and fought the urges to turn back. I hiked high into the air, stretched on tall peaks and took in the views. I woke up every morning with no goals but just the need to go.
Updated on February 16, 2016
“Hammock nap at sunset on the OB Pier in San Diego”
For the past 10 days, I’ve been on an adventure with RBK, my fellow JOBLESS in Jersey City friend.
Read and watch more about JOBLESS in Jersey City.
We flew from New York City to Sacramento, California. We spent a few days in Sacramento, Mill Valley and Napa tasting wine, looking at huge trees and climbing up mountains. In San Francisco, we partied for Chinese New Year and watched the sun rise and set over the ocean. We trained down the coast on Amtrak as the ocean and hilly landscapes rolled slowly on by. In San Diego, we met up with friends, whales and dolphins.
Our lodging was unique and diverse: we stayed in an airstream, hostels, hotels, random bedrooms and train cars. We bonded over wine, nature, jello shots, karaoke and sharing a bed for 10 days. Even the night we managed to lose house keys in a single bedroom while on our way out to dinner, we never got upset at each other but rather just worked through things – even through the extreme hanger (Hunger+Anger). It’s been a healthy and adult trip.
The more we sweat and the further we climbed, the deeper RBK seemed to relax and open up. It’s really inspiring to see your friend emerge a more confident, stronger woman.
Maybe I’m sexist to my own sex, but as I woman, I have a fear of traveling alone. When the opportunity came up to do this journey with RBK, I jumped on it. She had a small window of time to work with yet I didn’t buy a return ticket. My time with her helped me get into the swing of constant travel and once she left, it was my chance to get over my fear. I thought our trip would help me clear my head, get re-inspired creatively and figure out what I want next in my life. (That’s a tall fucking order for a single sabbatical!)
What I’ve come to realize is the resentment and anger I’ve been holding in has crept into my blood and my breath. It’s a consuming force. Before being able to move ahead, I need to be able to let go and breathe. The first 10 days of this trip I have really made strides towards letting go. Now it’s time to breathe.
#LESSONOFTHEDAY – Thank you RBK! You’re absolutely right. I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to do.
Stay tuned to see if I breathe or turn blue… These thoughts and stories will be videos soon, but for now check out these snippets.
Updated on January 31, 2016
Quitting my job to take a breath was a really difficult decision. To be frank, it’s fucking scary.
The moment I decided for sure I was going to do it, I felt like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. The moment I wrote my letter of resignation, I felt very emotional, almost nostalgic already. The moment I submitted my letter, I questioned the shit out of myself and did nervous dancing all over my kitchen. The moment I got the response that didn’t fight to keep me, the breath got stuck in my throat and the tears fought to come out. The moment I walked out and everyone stopped me to tell me what I meant to them, I realized what an impact I actually made on people and it warmed my heart.
Updated on January 27, 2016
Sunday Stall /ˈsəndā,ˈsəndē/ /stôl/
noun – the process of drinking, starting at “brunch” to make Sunday drag on as long as possible, to prolong the Monday from ever coming.
What better way to start a Sunday Stall than with an Espresso Stout?
Espresso. Stout Beer. COMBINED.
Too early to enjoy a beautiful stout? Why not add it to your waffles instead.
Updated on January 16, 2016
When Brian told me he was renting a cabin to go record a Christmas album with his band, Leaf Pile and asked if I could come to document their adventure, I was all in. We all packed our bags and drove three hours to Phoenicia New York in the Catskills. We got in super late and unpacked the beer and gear in the dark.
Updated on January 16, 2016
Last weekend, my lady friends Alisson and Sarah came over for what we planned to be a lazy Saturday afternoon full of coffee and baking. In standard small apartment fashion, we all crunched into the kitchen. I suppose everyone gathering around the food is human nature.
Updated on January 16, 2016
While on an adventure in Chicago, I visited my friend Kaitlyn. Over margaritas and getting chatted up about our awesome shoes from men adorned in dresses while having beards, Kaitlyn and I began to chat about our color auras. She took an online quiz and had a laugh about her results.
Kaitlyn: a very organized, on-time, yet fun loving and super sarcastic gal was green and tan.
TAN?? I said. So funny! It seems like such a boring color and she is the opposite of boring. So I decide to take the test too.
My results were yellow and a side of abstract tan. What in the world..once back home, I looked at a sliver of a day in the life of a CourTney, and then it all makes sense.
What the fuck is Abstract Tan?
I am very organized, but getting to the end result is a bit different than for most. I dated a boy who once called me a tornado….I’m sure my mom would agree.
Posted on March 15, 2015
I think dieting is bullshit. I am under the belief that my body knows what it needs: I crave it. Then I eat it. Sometimes that might be pineapple for a solid week, sometimes celery for breakfast and pancakes for dinner. As long as I eat lots of colors (no sprinkle doughnuts sadly do NOT count) I feel that I’m in good shape.